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Infertility, Loss/Greed, Bravery Adoption/Motherhood

Before I get started let me bind a few things! Do not be ashamed, do not be afraid! Be opened and vulnerable.. Ok first thing is...

infertility Infertility is discovering strength you didn’t know you had Infertility is being jealous of your pregnant sister, friend, family member , co-worker, whoever! Infertility is a medical condition not a sign of weakness or failure of who you are as a woman A positive pregnancy test does not define your worth Infertility is not your identity Do not let the stress of infertility overtake your life. It’s hard, it’s brutal. Feel those emotions but do not let it consume you! In this journey be gentle with yourself. Give yourself grace. You are doing the best you can. Trust and believe In the blessing within the storm. When the world says “give up” let hope whisper and say “try again!’ LET YOUR HOPES, NOT YOUR HURTS SHAPE YOUR FUTURE! God knows the plans he has for us.. Even miracles take time Loss/grief/bravery LOSS—- when you survive loss... everyone is so quick to tell you how strong you are, and how tough you must be BUT actually, no one has a choice but to survive grief do they? It’s not optional... you just have to cry and pray you will make it. GRIEF—— I’ve learned that grief is really just love... It’s all the love you want to give, but cannot. All of that unspent love gathers in the corners of your eyes, that lump in your throat, and that hallow part of your chest... it is love with no place to go! It’s okay to not be okay.. go through the motions of grieving properly.. pray, journal, seek counsel!! Do not allow society and others to put a time on your grief.. it is a process. You’re human. Everyone is different . YOU WILL HEAL WHEN YOU ARE READY TO..NOT WHEN THEY SAY YOU SHOULD.... IT’s okay if you thought you were better and hit you all over again.. its ok to fall apart even after thinking you had it all under control. There is no timeline for healing and grieving Bravery— everyone would define it as something different . I believe it is when someone faces something head on when the only thing they want to do is run. It is taking the chance to find joy and happiness , when you know the results could be more pain and devastation. To me every person who has a lost a baby but has taken the steps to say “yes we will try again” that is brave, that courageous....and these people are my heroes...

Adoption- It is indeed a blessing! I’m grateful for it! I’m thankful for it! Look more into it if that’s something you want to do... MOTHERHOOD As we know, it is indeed a blessing! But let’s talk about the raw and the real when it comes to motherhood.... Motherhood is hard no matter how much you pray for it and want it. It is hard. Postpartum is real... in mothers, adoptive mothers, just in general it is real Motherhood- again it is hard. Allow me to be transparent for a moment... as much as I wanted to be a mom, as much as I cried and prayed about it.. it is still hard.. as you are learning, growing, and trying to figure it all out.. you have days were the child is just crying and you don’t know why... you then become frustrated because you don’t know and they can’t tell you why. Sometimes you can’t have a moment to breathe because the child is fussy and needy and just want you. It is okay to be frustrated! It is not easy! But through it all, just take a breather when you can and be the best you can be to that Child in that moment. VENT. PRAY. JOURNAL.. make sure you have some type of outlet so you won’t drive yourself crazy... LET ME JUST ADD THIS AS A SIDE BAR: For those trying , seeing a negative result on a pregnancy test isn’t just disappointing. It isn’t just sad and a matter of trying again next time or next month. For many it is soul crushing and heart wrenching. It’s time the world stop devaluing and disregarding this incredibly hard journey to parenthood. For those who stood in the rain to find your rainbow. We celebrate you! For those who are still standing in the rain, we see you! Sometimes the people around you wont understand your journey and that’s okay, they don’t need to, because it is not for them For some, its not that they are afraid to try again, they are afraid to get hurt again. The silence of miscarriage, infertility, and peoples reluctance to talk about it openly, spurred me to want to do something to raise awareness. Also lets address the elephant that be in most rooms/conversations It If you know someone that struggles with infertility In any way, that has loss a child or anything remotely close— if you feel that they aren’t happy for you or celebrating you the way you think they should .... they are happy for you , they are just broken for themselves.. or sometimes they don’t know how to be. Not because they don’t want to.. its because it pains them. This is hard, it’s brutal, it is rough.. so give them grace! Always know.... God trusted you with this journey so trust him in this journey It’s not just a statistic, its you, its me! Love,

S. Rena


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